Issue 99: 28 Nov 2019

Hymn of Thanksgiving

By IE Sommsin Rejoice now, thou Christian boldly sneering. Thine nation is ruled by one most holy who in deed mocks the sick and the lowly, but who knows what thou hate and art fearing. Hark! For he hath come to enrich the rich and bring comfort to the brazen craven with their condos, yachts, […]

Reverse Existential Crisis

By Emmett Forrest My mom used to tell this story all the time When the nurses tried to give me yet another shot I glared at the nurses until they cried When the doctor tried to slip in another IV he needed 3 nurses to hold down a blue faced baby By the time I […]

St. Donald, Patron Saint of Denial

By Laura King The tweets come to rest on his chest and shoulders as he gives a first-light audience to the Presidential roses. Last night’s dream still shimmers: a waterfall, biggest ever, in New York, backsplashed with diamonds, applauded by palms, lush as a vulva. He won’t say “climate change.” That would break the spell […]

Do Stupid Things Faster With More Energy

By Sasha Ockenden Stanley pressed the “on” button on his monitor, pulled the keyboard towards him and entered an uninterrupted series of keystrokes for fifteen minutes, followed by six mouse clicks. Then he stood up. Two people worked in the office: Stanley, whose ID card on the desk in front of him read “Communications Innovator,” […]

From the Bottom (of my heart, my head)

By Jacquelyn “Jacsun” Shah   I know I can’t, I won’t, I don’t rebel although the current Top is not correct. And I am impotent, cannot expel the Top. It’s spinning like a carrousel whose platform and its horses are unchecked. I know I can’t, I won’t, I don’t rebel. A beast, the Top is […]

Monarchy

By Matthew Nelson Hendryx The warrant for my informant’s arrest meant meeting in a public place where we could keep track of anyone approaching. We settled for the revamped carousel on the National Mall. He could watch in all directions as we rotated. I, freelance reporter Stacy Prickelton, was meeting with a prominent member of […]