Not Dear Mr

By Elisabeth Horan

Let’s get something straight.
This pussy is not for you.
Pussy is for me and my sisters.
Pussy is something I eat for breakfast lunch and dinner.
You might eat vaginas.
Poor those vaginas.

Pussy is something that sits on my lap and purrs and is
soft and sweet and hunts mice for me.
I suppose you could have a cat.
I hardly bet you would stroke it though and
it might scratch you too like us sisters would do to you.

Pussy is nice.
Pussy is mine.
But I am not a pussy.
There is a pussy in my pants but it’s only for my sisters.

You may not grab me or my sisters by the
pussy or vagina or cunt or beaver or cootch.

You may not.
You have no access.

“Cunt” is what I get to say when I stub my toe.
You may say, “Gosh darn it!”

Beavers are in my pond slapping their big wide tails and
eating trees with their sisters.

Cootch – is for cootchie-cootchie coo – I see you!

A pussy-bow, well I just don’t know.
Let’s rename it penis-testicle tie.
More apt for its inverted upside-down shape and the ridiculousness of it all.

We don’t want you.
Us sisters and all our pussies together, are stronger than you.
And our pussies will sneak up behind you and
ask you if you want to go furniture shopping and then eat you alive.

Sincerely not yours:
The pussy, cunt, beaver, cootch, vagina, et al. Sisterhood.

 


Elisabeth Horan is an imperfect creature from Vermont advocating for animals, children and those suffering alone and in pain—especially those ostracized by disability and mental illness. She has two sons. She is trying very hard. She teaches ESL and community college liberal arts. Elisabeth is at Moonchild & Occulum & Burning House & Milk & Beans & Blanket Sea and other pro feminist places. Her chapbook Pensacola Girls (with Kristin Garth) was published by Bone & Ink Press, October 2018. She cries a lot, but is learning to smile 🙂  She loves being a poet and a mom. Follow her on Twitter at @ehoranpoet and visit her website: ehoranpoet.com.

Photo credit: Cosimo Roams via a Creative Commons license.

Plato says–

By Elisabeth Horan

Nothing in the affairs of men is worthy of great anxiety
&^%$$%*!
Ahem, the affairs of women, now let’s examine that

Breakups
Acne
Skinny
Not skinny
Fat as hell
Beauty Contests
Potlucks

Hurricane Sandys
Our Babies
Sandy Hooks
Our Chilluns
Fergusons
Nuestros Hijos/as
Border walls
Familias separadas
Harvey/Irma/Jose/Maria

Trumps/Putins/Pences/Fences
Congress/Senate/Selfish/Impasse
Health insurance/Obamacare/Medicaid/Medicare
Is Obama ok, where is he now?

Money
The 99%
The 1%

Polar Bears
Melty winters
Choices, choices, choices
Decisions, decisions, decisions
Cancer
Thyroid
Pills, pills, pills

Mother/Father
Alzheimer’s
Sons/Daughters
Bullies
Teasing
Eating Disorders
Driving permits
Hymens
Condoms
Abortion/adoption/PMS/infertility/fertility/C-section/menopause
Vaginas
Pussies

Senility
Lucidity
Addiction
Addiction
Addiction
Therapy

Death, death, death –
Losing
Winning
Knowing

 


Elisabeth Horan is a poet mother student lover of kind people and animals, homesteading in Vermont with her tolerant partner and two young sons. She hopes the earth can withstand us and that humans may learn to be more kind to each other and to Mother Nature. She was recently featured in Quail Bell Magazine and Dying Dahlia Review. She has work forthcoming at The Occulum, Alexander & Brook and at Switchgrass Review. Elisabeth is a 2018 MFA candidate at Lindenwood University and teaches at River Valley Community College in New Hampshire. Follow her on Twitter @ehoranpoet.

Image credit: Plato’s Academy. Mosaic from Pompeii (Villa of T. Siminius Stephanus). Second style. Early 1st century B.C. Inv. No. 124545. Naples, National Archaeological Museum.

Who We Are

By Elisabeth Horan

 

Worrying        scared             ashamed        embarrassed                         angry
sexualized      objectified      demonized
Fat                   disgusting      too thin           too woman
Lesbians         gays                fags                 hags
Sluts                pussies
African American Latinas/os Hispanics Indians Native Americans
Refugees        Syrians           Yemenis         Afghanis         Iraqis              Sudanese
Famine           war                 death
Ignore             /          Ignorance
Bombings       cars on sidewalks                  underground           aboveground             France
UK               USA                 Kabul             Mosul             Mogadishu                 Isis
Boko Haram                           Nigeria            Kenya
Internet                      hate                            trolls
Mother Nature          /          Nurture
Rivers, streams, fish, birds, snakes, bugs, bees, butterflies, bears, coyotes, wolves
Bears Ears                  Arches                        Anasazi Run              Petroglyphs
Clean water              Fracking                    Halliburton                Cheney
Earthquakes              hurricanes                 tornados                     flooding
Self-esteem               respect                       bullying                      suicide
Homeless                    neglected pets           neglected                   people
Pregnant women     abortion clinics         rape survivors          incest survivors
Texas                          intimidation
Hoodies                     guns                           men in Blue              men in Black
Black men
Charlottesville
Sexual assault           police brutality         Emmett Till               Malcolm X
Obama           Oh Lord God, Hast Thou Forsaken Us – ?               Martin Luther King Jr.
Sanders Clinton Warren Leahy                 messy, messy
McConnell Cruz Ryan                                  angry, angry

Elisabeth (Me ) and _____________ (You ).

 


Elisabeth Horan is a poet mother student lover of kind people and animals, homesteading in Vermont with her tolerant partner and two young sons. She hopes the earth can withstand us and that humans may learn to be more kind to each other and to Mother Nature.

She has recently been featured in Quail Bell Magazine and Dying Dahlia Review. She has work forthcoming at The Occulum, Alexander & Brook and at Switchgrass Review.

Elisabeth is a 2018 MFA Candidate at Lindenwood University and teaches at River Valley Community College in New Hampshire. Follow her @ehoranpoet.

I Promise I’ll Pick Up

By Elisabeth Horan

I’ve been left out

They had a baby shower without me
I’m not pregnant right now but I can still be pretty fun sometimes

They’re constructing a pipeline,
Under rivers of bones and shale
Through the homes of the earthworms

Didn’t ask the worms if that was ok
Didn’t ask me either

They are dissecting my insurance – My taxes My womb, my WIC, my Medicaid, my Safety Net
I am a poor poet you see But I still need some food and my meds
You don’t want to see me without my meds, Senators
And support and maybe even a little respect

I paid taxes, I sure did –
For 20 years as a secretary
First in an otolaryngology clinic, then in an estate planning law firm
They could call me, I would talk

I would tell them:
He’s out at lunch right now, would you like his voice mail?
You can come in to sign your wills at 1:15 Yes Sir, they will be ready

Also: Have a heart
Also: Don’t touch my body

Invite me to be your friend, I promise I can be fun still
Even if I’m not pregnant and happy like you
Even if I’m not in power like you
I’m always here
On my couch
Ready to talk
Waiting for the phone to ring –
I’ll check the caller ID –
But if it’s you,
I promise I’ll pick up.


Elisabeth Horan is a poet mother student lover of kind people and animals, homesteading in Vermont with her tolerant partner and two young sons. She hopes the earth can withstand us and that humans may learn to be more kind to each other and to Mother Nature. She has recently been featured in Quail Bell Magazine and Dying Dahlia Review. She has work forthcoming at The Occulum, Alexander & Brook and at Switchgrass Review. Elisabeth is a 2018 MFA candidate at Lindenwood University and teaches at River Valley Community College in New Hampshire. Follow her @ehoranpoet.

Photo credit: Sarah Laval via a Creative Commons license.